12/31/2012

Making your life work for you

I recently had an insight while playing a game of dice.  [note: insights can come from anywhere!  Pay attention.]  There were eight people playing.  During each person's turn I sincerely and truly hoped they would roll the numbers they were trying for so they could get a high score.  When my turn came I just rolled without caring too much what the outcome would be.  I was enjoying the game and, while I hoped I would get what I was rolling for, I wasn't too attached to the outcome.  At the end of the game I had the highest score.  In fact, I scored higher than I ever had before!

In contrast, when I had played that same game before, I became anxious at my turn.  I really wanted the dice to fall in my favor.  At other people's turn, I secretly hoped they would do badly, so my score would be better in comparison.  I never did very well.

How many times have you secretly hoped someone else would fail so you would look better by comparison?  Do you feel better when you notice that someone else is fatter, poorer, sicker than you?  Do you feel worse when you see someone who is thinner, richer, healthier.....?

Our culture is set up so that when one person wins, everyone else loses.  All of our games are set up this way.  This is a dis-ease of the mind.  It is insane.  It stems from lack, fear of lack and a belief that there is not enough to go around.  A belief that if someone else wins, you will lose.  If someone else gets something, you will not.  It's very Darwinian; survival of the fittest, dog-eat-dog etc.

Let's start with a new premise.  There is enough.  Everyone can win.  The Universe will expand to meet all needs.

I used to feel resentment when I saw people who had too much.  They were taking more than their share, in my opinion.  Now, if I catch myself thinking such things,  I change it to being happy for them that they have what they have.  Truly happy.  I appreciate that they have nice things, a nice home or car, a healthy body or beautiful hair.  Whatever. 

When I look around me, my life is very nice.  I appreciate that.  The state of the world doesn't look so good to me, but my immediate reality is very good.  I do what I can about the state of the world but I don't allow it to consume or depress me.  That won't help.  A disaster on the other side of the world is not in my reality.  I wish them well, maybe contribute to the Red Cross, and mind my business.

You get what you focus on.  Mind where you put your attention.  If your attention is on winning at any cost and wishing others harm, that is the experience you will attract.  If you feel over-anxious about an outcome, you are damming up the flow.  If you are fighting a disease or a cause, then you are playing the helpless victim, and that is what you will be.  Instead, make a clear statement to yourself and to the Universe about what it is you want to achieve, imagine what it would be like to achieve it and then go mow the lawn or something. 

Pay attention to how you feel.  Are you anxious, worried, scared?  Is your body tense?  Then you are fighting against rather than going with the flow.

Why not play it like the game of dice?  Don't take it so seriously.  Relax.  Truly wish the best for your fellow players in the game of life.  When it's your turn, have what you want in your mind and roll your dice.  Accept your results, enjoy the game and roll again next time your turn comes around.

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